The 15 Minute Dating Blog

by Ye Xiaoyu.

Charles was one of those friends like dried meat; he will last forever if you keep it right. It was no wonder that when I told him I was back in the city he excitedly invited me to his birthday party. I had really wanted to finally meet his fiancé. The day he asked me I was sitting in my room, naked as usual, and made a decision right there. The path to recovery meant getting out and continuing my life where it left off.

The meal was uneventful except for Charles who ate a 32 oz steak single handedly after demolishing the appetizers. Charles was always this excited guy and the fact that he had not slept more than 3 hours in 3 days meant he was manic. His constant aerobic demonstrations made the rest of us who were out of shape and well rested feel jealous. Afterwards we ended up in his place, with me ignoring many phone calls wondering when I would get home.

We broke into two splinter groups, one that enjoyed World of Warcraft far too much and the rest of the people trying to be social by talking over Resistance: The Fall of Man as we passed the controller amongst ourselves. Charles and me started talking and eventually the topic returned to my current ‘funk’ as I describe it that way at most three times a month. “Man, you aren’t doing well” he said. I did not respond, I was tired of hearing myself say it. “How about I find you a girl?” he suggested. I laughed, probably a second too long judging by his reaction. “Maybe you should, all I know is that I’m oscillating between horny as hell and depressed.” I said. I picked up the beer bottle and took a long drink from it. Charles had that concerned look on his face. “You’re taking this pretty hard aren’t you?” he said in that slow tone that was unusual for him. I did not want to say anything, and I did not have to.

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by Leora Klein.(edited by Alix Strauss)

Dan sounded great on paper: Upper East Side, Fieldston, Brown undergrad, NYU Law, formerly a corporate lawyer, currently a CEO of a nonprofit that seeks to foster peace between Palestinian and Israeli children…My mother met his mother at a charity dinner. Seated next to each other, nibbling on raisin nut rolls, patiently waiting for their salad plates to be whisked away, they noticed that neither woman ate the shaved fennel. By the time the blackened sea bass was served they were dear friends. She didn’t wait for dessert to show my mother a photograph of her son, and my mother called me from the car on her way home to tell me the great news.

“She had a photograph of her son in her evening bag?”

“Actually, she had it on her cell phone, and he looked very handsome with a nice head of hair.”

“Did you inquire about his height?” I am 5’9″.

“I did and she said he was taller than her husband, and her husband was tall.”

He sounded too perfect. My mother always taught me perfect doesn’t exist.

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by Gregory Smith.

As a single person, we all make mistakes out in the dating world. If you are freshly single, you tend to make some fairly stupid mistakes related to etiquette – like assuming too much about a woman or a relationship, or being nervous, or not really knowing what you are doing, etc. For those of us who have been around the block once or twice (ha), being someone’s WORST DATE EVER takes on a whole new meaning. Although it can be quite an accidental art form, in most cases it is just flat out stupid. Part of the majesty of being single is one’s ability to go out and make dumb mistakes … not repeat them … and hopefully laugh about them later. As long as you learn from your mistakes, you’re fine.

I’ve lived with my present girlfriend for several years – and I’d say this relationship (among other things) brings me stability. Prior to her, however, I went through phases where I found myself in various highly entertaining situations … not all of which turned out well. For example, what I’m about to describe is an evening where I’m quite positive I turned out to be THE WORST DATE EVER for the woman I was out with. I, myself, have been out with different women who could compete for being MY worst date … but I thought it would be fun today (New Year’s Day) to write something critical about myself. ;o)

Cindy was a tall good-looking redhead – several inches taller than me, in fact. I had known Cindy for roughly ten years … and for quite some time our relationship consisted of us hooking up maybe once or twice a year for a date which almost always ended up in screaming hot sex. I didn’t see her more than maybe twice a year because she lived in Santa Barbara – which made her “geographically undesirable” in terms of being a regular girlfriend or lover. Neither of us wanted to trade in our respective jobs and move – as we just weren’t that interested in one another. We had sex … great sex … but that was where our mutual interest ended. She was also pretty fun to party with – we’d usually go out to a restaurant or club, and party pretty well before the real entertainment got started at either her place, or at my hotel.

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by Samantha Jacobs.

He was a few clowns short of a circus, and had a mop of curls on his head that could easily be mistaken for a miniature poodle. Nonetheless, I was attracted; apparently, so was he.

We started dating in my sophomore year of high school. We were hooked up through a particularly heinous form of online dating: the “Instant Message Blind Date.” Here’s how it works: a (hopefully) well-intentioned mutual friend sells you on each other and exchanges your screen names. Voila, dinner and a movie via AOL.

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by Heather.

One night in July, I was up late on the computer, and recieved an instant message from some guy. It stated, “Hey, remember me?” I didn’t know who it was so I asked him a few questions to see if I could remember. Well, he told me that I met him at some party, which wasn’t true, b/c I hadn’t been to any parties in years. Turns out, I really didn’t know him, just some random instant message. He was the funniest person I had ever encountered on the net, so I just kept talking to him.

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by Chania

Well, dating is never easy when you’re 16 and desperately want a boyfriend, but it can get much more difficult if you’re very naive and with your head in the clouds.

I had my first boyfriend at 15 (it only lasted a month and a half), and I can’t possible imagine what I saw in him then. But at that moment I was so eager to have a boyfriend that I was literally “blind”. One afternoon, after waiting 3 or 4 days for him to call, I simply got out of the house, in spite of my father’s warnings that it is embarrassing for a girl to look for a boy and to contact him, and that she should wait (“That’s what I have been doing for 3 days, dad! I want to see him!” Man, how desperate it sounds now…) and I went to his block of flats. I knew that at that hour (around 6.30 pm) he should be outside with the boys, playing football. But nobody was there, probably because it was dark and cold.

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by Karen Rodriguez

I was 24 years old and divorced living in a house with six other flight attendants, with only a laptop and a suitcase as my real processions. However, that wasn’t the worst part. I was now at the airport being picked up by my first date via Myspace, which is a current site being used by people who were too broke to pay any fees at a real dating site. Surely, this was a recipe for disaster, but having found love and marriage so quickly at a young age once makes me an eternal romantic.

His name was Peter. He was 26 years old, divorced, with a 5 year old daughter, and working at a hardware store. Amazing the potential suitors you can find by just typing in your zip code while including a twenty mile radius. Even if we did not have movies, passions, and interests in common, we had divorce, starting over and heartache to dwell on. Soon after, what followed were the awkward first phone calls. After the second week of phone conversations he let me know he told his daughter that he had a new girlfriend. This should have set off an alarm in my head. Instead I was flattered. A flight attendant’s life could at times be very lonely, and a friendly voice during a layover in Alaska or Kuwait was better than watching an episode of the Golden Girls.

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by Paul G Akins Jr.

Dating can be summed up in one word, annoying. The whole process and all of the games involved irritate the hell out of me. Which is why when my friends suggested that I give online dating a try I politely said hell no.

But after about a month of harassment and ridicule I signed up to a few sites to test my luck. I was surprised by the shear number of sites and how many lonely and horny women there are out there. All just waiting for Mr. Right, but for right now they’ll settle for Mr. Big Johnson and Sir Quick Tongue.

I met a few women online but one stands out. Her names was, well you don’t really need to know her name—besides it was bootyluscious or lickous or something. Her real name wasn’t important, however her butt was. From the pictures she had on her site this girl had a nice big, juicy, yet firm butt.

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by Sara Hodon.

Online dating is not for the faint of heart. It’s good if you post a profile but don’t have the highest expectations in the world, because more often than not, you’ll be disappointed. But if you’re considering trying it—congratulations! You’re far braver than about 80% of the single population out there.

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m no stranger to the world of online dating. Though I haven’t met a bona fide, “Okay-I-must-be-leaving-now-because-you’re-too-weird-for-words” wacko, I’ve definitely had my share of bad experiences. The hard part is just getting through the date itself. This can be tricky, particularly if you seemed to hit it off so well when you first started talking. Sadly, my friends, a person can post as many pictures as they want, but until you experience the real thing, you can truly only take a picture at face value.

So the real question remains—how do you make it past those awkward moments on a first date?

Unfortunately, I really don’t recommend jumping out of the bathroom window—that is, unless you absolutely have no other choice. As a wise man once said, sometimes you just have to suck it up. It is possible to meet The One online (I know plenty of people who have), but it’s a lot like shopping for bargains—the trick is to sort through the rejects until you get to the one worth keeping.

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by Wais Hassan.

There have been numerous articles written recently about online dating and courtship but I have not seen many from the Muslim perspective. Actually, there are a number of Muslim dating sites that have popped up during the past few years and some of them are pretty well designed and have thousands of registered users. I, an Afghan American 1st generation graduate student, have joined a couple of these sites during the past few years.

It is so difficult to meet and become friends with Muslim women in my everyday life because there are so many expectations the culture places on both men and women. Women do not want to be perceived as being loose or immoral and many who date will never admit to actually be dating anyone. All Muslim parents I know frown on casual dating and most of my relatives agreed to arranged marriages when they decided they were ready to settle down.

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by Janet Trakin.

I’m a self-defined lesbian, but what lesbian isn’t tempted by a cute guy? I recently posted my profile and picture on My Space.com, that intergenerational melting pot of cyberbabies and misfits. Where most people wrote, Angelina Jolie, Dalai Lama, Hillary Clinton and other assorted luminaries under the question, “Whom would you most like to meet?”, I wrote, “A woman who understands me on all levels.” Amazingly so, my inbox was then inundated by a barrage of e-mails from male geeks from all around the world.

Among the photo of a tribal chief from Ghana, an e-mail of a faceless British artist, and a hate-filled, homophobic abusive e-mail from a Yugoslavian 16-year old punk, appeared the picture of Tom Smith. He had dark hair just messy enough not to be neat, dark brooding eyes and a sweet smile. He appeared to have a melancholy spirit underneath the smile, and his broad shoulders hinted of strength and masculinity–the perfect combination of the hopeless romantic and macho man…the poet and football player…Jung’s anima and animas. His e-mail contained life-weary original musings on love, a desire to settle down, and a propensity to do “anything for love.” I checked him out.

Tom’s profile appeared to be hastily put together just so that he could answer ads. Whereas many people on My Space go to great lengths to create an elaborate, impressive web site, Tom’s remained blank, and only “United States” appeared under his name and age. But the photo—ooh the photo. With no hesitation, I returned his e-mail.

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by E. Tracy Coker.

After several weeks of searching through the internet dating site I subscribed to, “Carl” (whose name has been changed) sent me a little message saying hello; from his profile and the things he said, he seemed like a nice guy. After a few days of e-mailing and a single phone call, Carl asked me to meet him at a subway station for a first date.

I was looking forward to this date. Carl not only seemed enthusiastic to meet me, but he was intelligent and seemingly down to Earth, as well. The real test was going to see if he looked anything like his picture.

I was a college student looking for a stable and loving relationship. He was a college graduate staying in Boston to attend dental school with the desire of becoming a dentist and opening his own practice. I’m no gold digger, but what girl doesn’t love an ambitious suitor?

Standing outside of the subway entrance, I watched people passing by, anxiously wondering which one of them would be Carl; finally, he emerged. He was handsome, just the right height for me, and I could feel our chemistry click. What I relief! Or so I thought.

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by Jason Nellis.

A warning to men everywhere: Don’t be stupid. I’ll be the first to admit, I am not, nor can I ever be, the perfect date or boyfriend. In fact, sometimes, I’ve been downright moronic. Chalk it up to being male (a commonly-blamed attribute), young (though this tends to shift—the older I get, the younger I claim to be), or impetuous (or, really, more like ADD, because—hey, look, a kitty cat!). Whatever the case may be, I’m not without faults. Most of the time, I end up getting myself into heaps of trouble by ignoring them rather than admitting to them.

Let me explain:

At the beginning of my junior year of college, I met a girl named Deanna. She was a freshman straight out of the South, twang and all. She was only four foot eleven, so I towered about a foot over her, but I found that more endearing than funny. She also called me on whatever BS I happened to be spewing (usually when I made outrageous claims to get attention, like “I invented the stapler.” I’m like that sometimes).

She was very cute, and I was very interested. So, of course, I made a move.

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by Deb Preece.

I have been on-line dating for years and my experiences have been everything from instant infatuation to the most horrendous escape out a bathroom window you could possibly have imagined. The one date that comes to my mind was a dance I was meeting a gentleman at whom I had spoken with on line. We had a most wonderful time and after we escaped up into the canyons of Utah for a view of a waterfall and a couple of “smooches”. He took me back to my car (which by the way had just had its breaks done the day before the 50 mile travel to meet my new “beau”).

Driving home, dressed in black hose, red (sexy to say the least) dress and 2 inch heels, I was approaching a light, when all of a sudden the left front tire of my car falls of, sparks are flying everywhere, my car axel is dragging on the ground going 40 miles per hour, and my tire proceeds to roll across the center of the street, across the opposite traffic and down an embankment. I slam on my breaks and for a moment really wondered what had just happened. As I got my wits about me, I opened my door and saw that my tire had actually fallen off my car. Of course, with my deep knowledge of tire and car repair (if it can’t be fixed with a band aid and a pair of high heels, I’m in trouble). I just stood in the middle of University Avenue at 1:30 AM in the morning and started to cry.

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This internet dating story by Wired Magazine has all the makings of a psychotic movie, complete with romance, jealousy, and murder.

Thomas Montgomery, a 45-year-old husband of 16 years and father of two teenage girls was living out a fantasy by pretending to be Tommy, a 19 year old marine who was getting ready to ship out to Iraq and who stood 6 feet tall.

In a chat room on Pogo.com, he met Jessi, an 17-year-old West Virginia girl, with whom he completely fell in love with. What little did Montgomery know was that Jessi was really Jessi’s mom who was using her daughter’s IM account.

The two really hit it off online. Tommy proposed to Jessi after eight months of instant messaging every day and speaking on the phone. Jessi accepted and sent Tommy G-Strings. In a strange New Year’s Eve resolution, Montgomery wrote on his note : “On January 2, 2006, Tom Montgomery (46 years old) ceases to exist and is replaced by an 18-year-old battle-scarred marine”.

Cindy, Montgomery’s wife in real life, eventually found out about the secret stash of G-Strings and her husband’s affair with Jessi. She immediately contacted Jessi and sent her family pictures of Montgomery in order to show that “Tommy” doesn’t really exist.

After Jessi found out about the real “Tommy” she became distraught and contacted Brian Barrett, a poker friend of Montgomery’s who also frequented Pogo.com. She wanted to verify about the truth about “Tommy”, which Brian confirmed that “Tommy” was indeed a fake.

Now this is where the plot thickens, for some reason the disappointed Jessi actually started an online romance with Brian, perhaps to fill her void over the loss of “Tommy”.

Montgomer eventually found out about the new relationship between Jessi and Brian. He was fill with so much Jelousy and rage that he brought a gun to work and shot Brian 3 times.

“…Ken Case, the assistant district attorney who worked on the case, said, “He was a guy who prior to this happening was a very dedicated father. To make that much of a transformation, as a result of communicating with a fictitious person, is pretty frightening.”…”

The article was surprisingly engaging and fairly well written. It even comes with complete detail IM transcripts between the 3 involved parties.

Here’s the link to the full article.

An IM Infatuation Turned to Romance. Then the Truth Came Out.

Now, for those who are involved in an internet romance, are you really sure your IM partner is really who they say they are?

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by Jayne Dressor.

I have always been the type to do research, but, I never thought internet dating would become one of my projects. It started very innocently; I was bored and lonely. Internet dating has become quite an “interesting” journey. to say the least. The word “interesting” is not really the word I would use to describe my experiences over the past 2 years.

I was a very naive individual; somewhat sheltered, in a worldly sort of way. If I had a mean bone in my body, it was never intentional. I took anyone and everyone, at their word. The reality wouldn’t kick in for quite a while.

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This is a great article about one woman’s experience with date rape, and how she got out of it. For you gals out there hopefully this can provide some tips on what to do if you are ever in the same situation like this.

Date Rape by Isis1854

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Here’s is a humorous article regarding one man’s futile attempts to get any one to respond to his dating profile.

The 5 Stages of Online Dating

Throughout this hopeless but somewhat comical ordeal, the author’s personal profile gradually went through these 5 stages:

Stage 1: The Actual Truth Stage
Stage 2: The “Fudging the Truth” Stage
Stage 3: The “Blatant Lying” Stage
Stage 4: The “Screw You Bastards” Stage
Stage 5: The “Giving Up On Society” Stage

Who says online dating is not fun?

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by Ed Attanasio.

I was very skeptical about entering the world of online dating when I initially signed up with match.com. As a 48-year-old single male with more issues than Reader’s Digest, my expectations were understandably low to start with. I’ve never been married, I don’t have any kids and my best friend is my shrink. I decided early on that I would probably be satisfied having a relationship with someone who simply had fewer problems than I did.

I had heard both horror stories as well as wondrous tales about the online dating experience, some undoubtedly as much fiction as truth, and all of them left me extremely tentative about entering the fray. One woman I know went on 26 online dates before meeting a suitable mate, whom she eventually married. I admired her thoroughness and determination. When I went to purchase a new car, I only looked at about five vehicles before making a decision. This gal kicked more emotional tires than I can count on all my appendages combined, which means she’s either a.) a complete control freak, b.) very high maintenance. c.) desperate as hell.

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by Nicholas E. Fesko.

I was going through a divorce. I was lonesome. I wanted someone to make me feel attractive, to understand my point of view, and give me hope for a happy life.

So I turned to my PC for help.

My foray into online dating came about slowly. First, I emailed a local newspaper columnist who was seeking stories for an upcoming piece about online dating.

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