How I almost married my AIM lover
by Heather.
One night in July, I was up late on the computer, and recieved an instant message from some guy. It stated, “Hey, remember me?” I didn’t know who it was so I asked him a few questions to see if I could remember. Well, he told me that I met him at some party, which wasn’t true, b/c I hadn’t been to any parties in years. Turns out, I really didn’t know him, just some random instant message. He was the funniest person I had ever encountered on the net, so I just kept talking to him.
We ended up talking for 4 hours and at the end, exchanged phone numbers. At the time, I was only living in Wichita for a month, and was then to move to Houston. This guy lived in Wichita also, so we decided to hang out while I was here, as friends. There wasn’t any romantic feelings between us anyway (turns out, they were suppressed). Since I was moving, I didn’t want anything to bring me back to Wichita, I fought as hard as I could. It wasn’t hard enough.
I ended up hanging out with him and his friends for a few weeks and then it happened. Those “magical” feelings started surfacing, and we decided to hook up and have a long distance thing. We were finally together, after only 2 weeks of knowing each other. We decided that we would only date if we wanted it to be a forever thing. I was up for the challange. I went home that night and told my poppa that I knew he was the one.
Only 5 days after seeing each other, he surprised me with a promise ring. He wanted me to know how serious he was and that I could trust him. I ended up leaving for Texas 2 weeks after we started dating. The long distance thing was very rough and expensive. We spoke on the phone and wrote on AIM ever day. We had only known each other for such a short time, but we were like peanut butter and jelly, better stuck together.
Only a month had past before he decided to fly me home. It was also my birthday present, perfect timing. While I was in Wichita, he surprised me again. This time it was for more permanent means, engagement. I flew back to Texas knowing that I wasn’t staying for long.
My new fiance planned to fly down to Houston and help me pack my belongings and help me drive back in November. oh and by the way “I” paid for everything! I knew if we could survive being away from each other for 3 months and then survive a 15 hour car trip together (w/o killing each other) we could make it for a lifetime.
After I moved back, we were together night and day. I moved in with him pretty much from the start. After only being together for only 6 mo. we desperatly wanting to start our family. Our family and friends had other words to say about our plans though. He and I decided it was then time for some drastic moves. We were going to get married right away in 2 days. Boy was that crazy! I planned whatever i can plan in such a short time…did not get my dream wedding of course but i thought i was going to be satisfied. Well…. He NEVER showed up!!!
So the next time you get an anonymous AIM, think twice before you close it in annoyance. It could be your knight in shining armour!
About the author: Heather is a 30 yr old beautiful single girl with a dream of finding her prince charming one day. She has been in the dating seen for quite a while now….and believe her she have tried everything. She has had her ups and downs and have found some really great friends along the way but still have yet to find that one special person. She just haven’t gotten there yet.
Popularity: 14% [?]
March 5th, 2008 at 1:19 am
Your advice at the end makes absolutely no sense. The guy left you standing at the altar, and you say that random AIM messages can be a good thing? Shouldn’t you be advising people to close it down?
March 5th, 2008 at 5:05 am
Wow. Is this a true story? All that in such a short time and then at the end he stands you up at the altar? Yikes. That is traumatic…
March 5th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Wow Heather…. I don’t blame him..you are beautiful
By the way remember me?
March 5th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Oh woops…sorry Heather, I was on a call and hadn’t read the last paragraph. That sucks..his loss for sure…take care…
March 6th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
For such a pretty girl, you sound desperate.
March 7th, 2008 at 8:47 am
I’d have to agree with Andrew on this one. It’s a little contradictory, especially at the end. I’d say you should be advising people to be a little more careful, ya?
March 7th, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Hi Heather-
Someone referred me to your blog. If you would like to figure out how to find the right guy for you, and then get him to commit, email me at coach@jessmccann.com
Jess
March 7th, 2008 at 7:08 pm
Well that is awful. I met my wife online and things worked out great.
Charles PIsano
March 8th, 2008 at 11:38 pm
Maybe you should use eharmony
March 9th, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Better luck next time Heather
March 10th, 2008 at 11:33 am
Hi Heather!
Sorry it didn’t work out. Sometimes life smacks us in the face without explanation. You DESERVE BETTER. …but have you hear from him since? (Did something “unfortunate happen to him” beyond his control. I hope not for his sake.)
For your sake, don’t loose hope. Call me. lol
Be Well.
Chuck
March 11th, 2008 at 2:45 am
WOW….I met my boyfriend at Agelesscupid.com….He is much oder than me…..BUT hE IS a good man….Love him so much
March 12th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
When my Ex agreed to move to my home I paid to get a bigger apartment, paid to fly up to Wyoming, paid to move her and her things all the way back to Florida. I paid quite a bit - and was deeply in love, too - including paying for her Xmas gifts for her kids and grandkids, and so on. When she decided I was never going to be more than a poor man, and left, I was heartbroken. But now I only have to pay for myself.
March 13th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
It was his loss. Anybody would be lucky to meet a good looking girl like you.
March 16th, 2008 at 12:54 am
If I were Heather, I’ll go find a with to curse him. Or no, I’ll curse him myself. Just kidding.
Indeed, you’ll never know what small talks/IM’ing brings - either your prince charming or a runaway groom.
March 16th, 2008 at 12:56 am
Erratum:
I’ll go find a witch (not a with) to curse him.
March 17th, 2008 at 2:31 am
Things happen for a reason. That’s a very traumatic experience, but I’m sure there’s someone out there who is really made for her.
March 17th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
I have met up with a girl 5 years ago and dating with her after I know her just for 1 week. Then we have been togather for 3 weeks and we break up. poor me.. poor me… distance is our problem..
louiss
March 17th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
The last paragraph through me for a loop!
I’ve heard of some online relationships ending in a great marriage, and I’ve heard of some of them ending in disaster. Dating is tough no matter where you meet. Thanks for sharing.
March 18th, 2008 at 2:54 am
Great photo. You look awesome. Nice!
March 20th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
do you know any other information about this subject in other languages?
March 21st, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Hey i remember you. lol that is one crazy story.
March 25th, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Heather,
I agree things happen for a reason, but that could have just as easily have worked out as it did not. The final outcome was beyond your control.
My wife and I met in the most random way. During St. Patrick’s weekend over six years ago my ship (I was in the Navy at the time) pulled into Boston for four days. On the day that connected me to my wife I was on duty on the ship, but some friends of mine met some friends of hers. Throughout the month that followed a friend of mine had been talking to a friend of hers, which led to her and two friends flying down to Virginia Beach for the weekend.
During that weekend I volunteered to work for the friend who was having them fly in and never intended to meet them. The day they flew in I asked my roommate if he wanted to go to the “strip” which is the area by the beach for lunch. After getting to the beach we met up with the friend who was having them fly down. He had no idea they would be there, but suggested we go to Chic’s cafe for lunch.
Sparing some details of Chic’s cafe, her friends invited me out with them that night. That night ended up with (my now wife) and I talking most the night.
Ok, how does this relate, hold on a second I’m getting there… I’m getting there. The next day I worked at could not get her off my mind, so the next morning I stopped by her hotel room and asked if she wanted to hang out (I know a gutsy move considering it was three girls on vacation), but she said not then, but later they would meet up with us (My friends and I). That night we all went out and had a great time.
The next morning the girls were flying out, so we escorted them to the airpot… now I’ll get to the point (and this is to anyone with a long distance relationship). We started a long distance relationship that had her flying down once a month for over a year. If our relationship revolved around who was paying there was no way we could have stayed together. It’s not that she had more money, but I was just about to purchase a condo and didn’t have the resources to fly her down.
This resulted in her paying for almost everything at the time. Fast forward a year (thank goodness for cell phones and text messages) and I presented an engagement ring to her (I called and asked her parents individually because they were not together, which was met with mixed answeres, but ended up with permission), a few months later I deployed overseas for a six months. Before deploying we discussed moving to Texas together after I returned (I gave her the choice of orders to the Northeast or Texas… and she chose Texas (I had not told her I had extended onboard the ship before meeting her to orders to Texas, because at that point I knew I could get orders anywhere I wanted).
This is getting long so I’ll get to the details: After a year and a half of having a long distance relationship I know that has given our relationship the base that has allowed us the relationship building needed before being married, the communication that is needed for a successful marriage, and the commitment to each other that only two soul mates can find.
I’m not saying instant or long distant relationship will work for everyone, but if both parties are committed to it and it is meant to be, then it will happen despite obstacles in the way.
I guess I’m trying to say don’t shut down hope (or close that window) just because the relationship does not come from a traditional source. It results from the two people committed to each other.
Steve
March 27th, 2008 at 9:36 am
WOW!!! From the beginning till the end I was on the edge of my seat! I could have NEVER guessed what the story’s end was.
To me it sounds absolutely unreasonble! You dated, you got to know each other close, and then OOPS - he never appears again! What was on his mind?!
Maybe it’s really true that men and women come from different planets?
March 27th, 2008 at 1:44 pm
hi sweet heather,d guy missed out! u ar captivating,everymans dream.giving such opportunity to spend a lifetime with a damsel like u,i won’t compromise it with anything else.sweetheart,u are really georgous.i will really love to hear from you.[femlah@yahoo.com] it will really be a pleasure! with fondest regards.
April 1st, 2008 at 5:09 pm
Heather, I’m sure you know this now, but with matters of the heart it sure is better to walk than to run. If it is for real then love will be around next week and next month.
You’ ll do okay though! I am sure of this.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:42 am
I met my soulmate online but not quite as rushed as you did. You are an attractive girl so I dont think finding eligble men will be a problem. Like you, I have a blog on the subject as well because it can work. Amazing story all the same.
goodluck
April 2nd, 2008 at 10:34 am
the guy lost a precious opportunity.pls may i know you better.iam a kool guy wit lot of experience about jilting like you because i was poor then but now i am ok financially but need someone reliable and trustworthy.tell u more about me wit you response.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:34 pm
that is sad. best of luck to you in the future.
April 4th, 2008 at 5:44 pm
boy is that a crazy story!
April 6th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
Did you at least still keep the ring…..How much is it worth?
April 9th, 2008 at 6:41 pm
That’s horrifying. Where is the closure in the story. You can’t end it like that. You guys lived together. What do you mean he didn’t show up???? You have two rings? Have you spoken to him? What does he have to say about himself?
I don’t buy that this is a true story.
Kenny
ny2texas@gmail.com
April 17th, 2008 at 4:00 am
Wow Heather…. You look awesome!
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:49 pm
I tend to be very skeptical when I read such stuff:
- did you just made up the punch line to leave us with a faked feeling of surprise?
or
- did that really happen?
In both cases this was such a waste of time
May 22nd, 2008 at 1:16 pm
I had similar experiences with online dating. I got some criticism about this recently, but I truely believe it is easier for people to lie about who they are online than in person.
May 26th, 2008 at 7:00 pm
For such a stunning and a beautiful girl like heather, I think you are desperate
““I” paid for everything!”
June 2nd, 2008 at 7:23 pm
another one bites the dust
June 15th, 2008 at 12:55 am
Heather, Such a sad story but there is hope!
June 22nd, 2008 at 4:35 pm
wow i like thats type of story
July 11th, 2008 at 1:14 am
I don’t believe this one bit.
July 23rd, 2008 at 1:10 am
love you hot u sex hot