Is that a Sty in your Eye?
by Karen Rodriguez

I was 24 years old and divorced living in a house with six other flight attendants, with only a laptop and a suitcase as my real processions. However, that wasn’t the worst part. I was now at the airport being picked up by my first date via Myspace, which is a current site being used by people who were too broke to pay any fees at a real dating site. Surely, this was a recipe for disaster, but having found love and marriage so quickly at a young age once makes me an eternal romantic.
His name was Peter. He was 26 years old, divorced, with a 5 year old daughter, and working at a hardware store. Amazing the potential suitors you can find by just typing in your zip code while including a twenty mile radius. Even if we did not have movies, passions, and interests in common, we had divorce, starting over and heartache to dwell on. Soon after, what followed were the awkward first phone calls. After the second week of phone conversations he let me know he told his daughter that he had a new girlfriend. This should have set off an alarm in my head. Instead I was flattered. A flight attendant’s life could at times be very lonely, and a friendly voice during a layover in Alaska or Kuwait was better than watching an episode of the Golden Girls.
A needed ride from the airport presented an opportunity for a meeting and a “date”. I was excited! A first date represents opportunity, a fresh start, and perhaps an end to a tragic spinsterhood. During the flight home to Atlanta, I risked death in the lavatories used by soldiers who came all the way from the Middle East, to redo my make up every half hour. After landing I made my walk down the concourse in my heels and dress which I tried not to wrinkle during a 9 hour flight.
We were meeting at the food court. I was so nervous I could hear my heart pounding against my chest. I looked around and then I saw him. I was frozen. He was short, very short. I was 5’7″ he was much shorter. He was pale and wearing a sweatshirt with corduroy pants. I thought about running away. How easy it would be. Then I realized I had no ride home. As I tried to decide he found me and made his way to me.
After the awkward greeting and the obvious “wow, you’re so tall” comment, he gave me the coffee he bought for me. It was a sweet gesture. Too bad I had not told him I was lactose intolerant. Coffee would do a number on my stomach, especially after eating airplane food for three weeks .Still I took, drank, smiled, and a little piece of me died on the inside. That’s when I noticed. A giant Sty in his left eye. I was embarrassed to be caught looking at it so I figured better to ignore it.
During the ride to lunch I kept thinking about the Sty. How does one get one? Why did he not cancel the date? Does he know he has it? I tried to take my mind off it. Peter took me to the finest establishment for lunch. Strike that, he took me to the Hard Rock Cafe. Who does that? Of all the places to go in an awesome city like Atlanta, why would Hard Rock Café seem like the most romantic, best, get-to-know-you-kind of place?
After ordering lunch the coffee kicked in. I excused myself and headed to the music memorabilia adorned bathroom. I was there for probably 30 minutes, not kidding. At that point I made calls to various girlfriends for table re-entry ideas. I had left my purse at the table so I had to go back. I figured a sty in the eye canceled out a coffee run attack. Of course he asked where I was and I lied and said I looked around at all the memorabilia hung all over the restaurant.
After the awkward lunch, he took me to another part of town to walk around. This is when he reached for my hand. We were walking the streets and holding hands. It felt so strange to do that with someone other than my ex-husband. I couldn’t help but think how wrong it felt. Peter sensed my discomfort and later admitted feeling the same way. After our mindless chit-chat I could no longer take it. I told Peter I had a flight back out that same night. It was the perfect excuse, yet I could tell he deep down knew it was a lie. I felt terrible for lying. I also felt terrible for wondering if his sty germs were contagious and there I was holding his germ infested hand.
As he dropped me off and carried my bags to the door, I thought about what a nice guy he was. He just was not the right guy for me at the moment. It was not because of his sty, the fact he worked at a hardware store, or that he only came up to my shoulders. It was for the reason we both knew it did not feel right. Perhaps it was too soon from our divorces or we were two puzzle pieces that did not fit.
After the experience, we talked as friends here and there never saying why we did not go on another date. When I took him off my friends list on My Space, he stopped calling. Even though it was a horrible blind first date, Peter came into my life, at the time he did, for a reason. I realized I needed to slow down, be ok on my own and laugh at the situations that make me cringe.
I do remember the last thing Peter said to me the day he dropped me off. “Man, can you believe this Sty in my Eye? I saw it this morning, did you notice it?” I just laughed and said,” No, I didn’t even know it was there”. Then I added, “I am lactose intolerant and the coffee you got me gave me the runs, did you notice that?” Sometimes the best asset in online dating is a sense of humor and no $10 overpriced restaurant hamburger can beat that!

About the author: To escape her bad first marriage, Karen became an international flight attendant. After a long period of bad dating, she met her future husband on a bus in Germany. Together they traveled the world until she got pregnant. Now Karen lives in Atlanta with her new husband and ten month baby girl. She has returned to school for Web Design and developing her line of non-toxic cleaning supplies.
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January 16th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
It’s a humorous story alright but what struck me is how the writer each step of the way denied plain honesty.
Thankfully there was a happy ending. I posted one recently which was not so rosy.
January 17th, 2008 at 1:05 am
Oh my gosh - that sounds so unbelievably awkward! Its always funny that after all the physical issues (sty and all) didn’t matter, your personalities just didn’t match. If that spark is there, then nothing else matters. There is a site that you all might find interesting. Its called personalityZone.com and you can take a free personality test and find out so much about yourself. I’m a Guardian and found it to be way more accurate than horoscopes or anything like that. Maybe before you meet your next blind online date, you could both take the quiz at personalityZone.com to see if your a match. Perhaps it could have saved you that 30 minutes in the hard rock bathroom
January 18th, 2008 at 8:04 am
..Hey.. First off: I love the service. It’s fun. I really like the writing style on this blog, and it looks awesome but.. I’m not all that fuzzed about the comments. I mean.. you don’t know much about the people participating in the discussion.
January 18th, 2008 at 8:31 am
It was seriously an awkward story but interesting nonetheless … At least she finally found happiness in then end.
January 20th, 2008 at 6:48 am
@Jollyjo: “the writer each step of the way denied plain honesty.” Well, could you honestly tell someone on a first (definitely last date) “man, you have a horrible nose, why didn’t you tell me your nose was so ugly?” Ofc not!
I dated someone for about 3 weeks, and he kissed me on the second week of dating for the first time. He had a horrible way of kissing: like his mouth was a vacuum cleaner. He sucked my mouth into his completely! I was disgusted, bleah! So it only lasted another week, cause I couldn’t just tell him on the spot: your way of kissing disgusts me.
January 20th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
Hey, just love your blog! Its a great blog! How about wining the Contest?
http://www.reallylousydates.com/contests/12/worse-valentines-day-story-contest/
You stand more than a good chance with so many dating stories!
January 20th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
Hmmm… Could height be the real issue? Was her future husband taller than her?
January 21st, 2008 at 3:52 am
Yeah he is taller than me
Even if only a couple inches, it still mattered to me. Weird I know….,
January 21st, 2008 at 11:03 am
This story teaches us, what the power of love is. Do not surrender until you find love.
I wish you all that you will find your soul mate as soon as possible…
Best Regards,
Yoni Levy.
January 21st, 2008 at 5:34 pm
This is a very interesting story, though is’s somehow hilarious but is it’s telling us not to jump into dating and to follow our feelings instead of simply getting along just because we are lonely.
January 21st, 2008 at 11:55 pm
I went out with a gal who turned out to have a really awful yeast infection, so I can totally relate to the sty thing. She also gave me crabs and herpes, which was a real drag. Glad to hear that you finally found a good guy. Congrats!
January 22nd, 2008 at 4:36 am
If pig gets a sty, is that called a pig sty?
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:38 am
What a Great Story* For some reason the Sty i guess reminded me of Marty Feldman + his Bulging Eyes* The movie he did Young Frankenstein with Gene Wilder was Hilarious!
;))
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:31 am
It is terrible how some women tell outright lies and are so cocky that they even believe their own lies and are sure the guy does no know. If you meet a guy on a date and for any reason you don’t like it, why stay and keep telling lies and more lies to him? Why not say something simple “This is not what I expected. I am sorry, we must end this date. But it is nice meeting you. Have a great day” Then you turn around and leave and go home. That would be better than all the silly lies. In 1997, I met a woman online, who sounded like an angel over the phone. She also said she was working as a book keeper. I was very excited because I needed the date. So, on the D day, I was dressed up like James Bond and went to meet her. You could not imagine my surprise when I saw my date was a 300lb dwarf!!!! As if that was not bad enough, she was wearing a red baseball cap, for goodness sake. I could understand the dwarfishness and fatness. But the red baseball cap? That was a puzzle. When I asked her why she was wearing it, she said it was to help me recognize her! I could not just tell her no, I did not want the date anymore because it took many weeks of chatting over the phone to get that date! So, I decided to go on with the date as planned. I took her to a movie, we ate and drank. Then after that I told her directly, that she was not what I expected and there will not be anymore dates, after that day. Then I took her home. That was the end. I did not see any wisdom in lying to her, being pretentious and running around the bush with her like some women do to men that they don’t like. If you have a date that was not what you expected, just get to the point and tell your date and then go home. That would be easier than being deceitful, pretentious and dishonest. Most women are guilty of all these.
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:02 pm
What a nice story! It reminded me my previous dating back to 8 years ago, met with a gal I knew from ICQ (for those who are old enough, should know this world first? instant messenger service)
Cheers
February 2nd, 2008 at 10:10 am
Great story. I’m happy to hear that you finally found a nice guy. I guess we all know how hard that is.
Regards
April 27th, 2008 at 11:56 am
That was a funny story. I could really feel the awkwardness and I have been in those shoes.
Peace
The Tampa Pirate
June 15th, 2008 at 1:00 am
Funny story! Glad to hear you had a happy ending.